I'm Not Doing This During Class. Definitely Not.

I am confused.
I’m writing this in my spare period at school. And I am very confused.
I’m putting off my school work to muse over my life, because I am doubleplusconfused.
I am so confused that I’m not taking words from 1984 and changing them for my own purposes. I do not have any real reasoning behind this. Pretend that links back to me being confused, kthx.

Well, now that I think about it, I’m not that confused. I have theories behind why certain things are happening, and I don’t think I’m too far off (though I’m sure I’m not a hundred percent correct. I can’t be right. I mean... that doesn’t even... I’m not going to think about that). I can comprehend what’s going on, so much so that I’m formulating my own little ideas about this all. So clearly I am not confused.
But... well, that word seems to suit my thoughts better than any other. Yeah, I get what’s going on. But there’s still some factor that’s utterly... perplexing... and I’m not quite sure what it is that makes things perplexing, nor can I explain this any better. I just can’t. I’m going to blame the English language and say there just aren’t enough words to describe this. I like insulting the English language though, and I have a feeling that there aren’t any languages that could describe this situation efficiently enough.

I won’t go into detail. No one wants to know about my social life. Just know that I completely understand everything that’s going on, and yet I still manage to be completely and utterly confused. Maybe... Maybe I understand what's going on, and I get the theory behind it, but on an emotional level my brain just goes whaaaat. Yeah. Yeah, maybe.

You know, the English language has so many synonyms, and yet we still aren’t specific enough in some areas. In Japanese, the words watashi, watakushi, atashi, ore and boku all translate best to I. They are different, but it’s close to impossible to show that in our language. Fail to us.

I should go do some work now. So much stuff is due... I can’t focus though. Gotta hate being unable to focus. I suppose, at the least, I could go make some notes or something. Ciao.