Final three exams of the year are on today and tomorrow. Two of which I have done no preparation for (yay!) and the third is a drama performance.
My good friend Lainey (if you find this, hello ^^) has miraculously vanished from MSN.
WHERE ARE YOU I NEED TO VENT ABOUT MY EXAMS. DX !!!
On another note (lolol, totes not a Death Note reference) I am listening to The Cure. Good stuff.
Nov 25, 2010
Nov 8, 2010
Now, the Obligatory Emo Teenager Post
Not that I'm in a depressed mood or anything. Just... out of it. And tired.
I feel that I cannot trust my eyesight. Colour is just a frequency that we can see, right? Meaning that everything around us isn't actually coloured.
It's all just... blank? Uncoloured? I'm not sure if it's additive or negative, so it's either all black or white.
Just nothing.
I was talking about stuff with my Dad. Something I've noticed is how melancholy abandoned buildings are. I relate it to how we rarely see them. You look at the buildings in the street and it's like they'll be there forever; They're so strong, right? They protect us, shelter us, give us somewhere warm and safe.
But without us keeping them in top condition, they fall apart.
Nothing's permanent.
Memento Mori;
We aren't permanent, either.
I've counted my life in coffee spoons, and all that (<--Good poem, that one. Go look it up).
I have to believe in something. I don't know why, but I just do. I'm not an idiot. I know what I've seen, what I've learned... we evolve. Darwin's theory is hardly immaculate, but it's close.
I just can't explain away morals. Yes, we are social animals. Yes, that means we will conform to and use (and, I suppose, abuse) social graces.
But morals are nothing like that. Everyone's moral compass is different. Why do we have morals, anyway? How would that help us with survival? Why are there things that are physically possible, and yet my brain goes no, you can't do that. I'm sorry, it's not morally right.
What.
Love is another thing. I understand mating for life in animals. I understand not mating for life as well. But why is the human race different? We can't be categorised like other animals can.
Why will a man jump in front of a bullet to save his best mate, or his lover, when he could save himself? Isn't passing on our own genes some driving force for us? Surely getting killed is a little bit... I don't know, unproductive?
So for that reason, I believe that there is someone who has created us, with a sense of morals and justice. I have no opinion on the afterlife. I don't care so much for the bible. And I really do despise the religious who are all self-righteous about what they believe in.
That said, I cannot believe that there is no higher power. It's too depressing, for me at least. Maybe that's weak of me. But, even so, who cares if I need to believe in something to be strong?
(Wow, totally just went off on my own tangent there. I love my ramblings. They make no sense.)
I feel that I cannot trust my eyesight. Colour is just a frequency that we can see, right? Meaning that everything around us isn't actually coloured.
It's all just... blank? Uncoloured? I'm not sure if it's additive or negative, so it's either all black or white.
Just nothing.
I was talking about stuff with my Dad. Something I've noticed is how melancholy abandoned buildings are. I relate it to how we rarely see them. You look at the buildings in the street and it's like they'll be there forever; They're so strong, right? They protect us, shelter us, give us somewhere warm and safe.
But without us keeping them in top condition, they fall apart.
Nothing's permanent.
Memento Mori;
We aren't permanent, either.
I've counted my life in coffee spoons, and all that (<--Good poem, that one. Go look it up).
I have to believe in something. I don't know why, but I just do. I'm not an idiot. I know what I've seen, what I've learned... we evolve. Darwin's theory is hardly immaculate, but it's close.
I just can't explain away morals. Yes, we are social animals. Yes, that means we will conform to and use (and, I suppose, abuse) social graces.
But morals are nothing like that. Everyone's moral compass is different. Why do we have morals, anyway? How would that help us with survival? Why are there things that are physically possible, and yet my brain goes no, you can't do that. I'm sorry, it's not morally right.
What.
Love is another thing. I understand mating for life in animals. I understand not mating for life as well. But why is the human race different? We can't be categorised like other animals can.
Why will a man jump in front of a bullet to save his best mate, or his lover, when he could save himself? Isn't passing on our own genes some driving force for us? Surely getting killed is a little bit... I don't know, unproductive?
So for that reason, I believe that there is someone who has created us, with a sense of morals and justice. I have no opinion on the afterlife. I don't care so much for the bible. And I really do despise the religious who are all self-righteous about what they believe in.
That said, I cannot believe that there is no higher power. It's too depressing, for me at least. Maybe that's weak of me. But, even so, who cares if I need to believe in something to be strong?
(Wow, totally just went off on my own tangent there. I love my ramblings. They make no sense.)
Nov 4, 2010
I Must Analyse Everything
Because my English teacher has brainwashed me.
So I finished watching Death Note last night. That last episode. Wow. Yeah. The first half is just a total mindfuck, and you have no idea who's going to win. Then Light goes off the deep end a little bit more, and the rest of the show ends up being rather... sad.
Not crying-sad, just... unfortunate-sad. You can't help but wonder if anyone made it out alright.
So this is what I've noticed throughout the series (Spoilers abound! Turn away if you didn't want to know which yaoi couples became canon, or which side decided to blow up a good portion of Greenland)
...[I'm kidding Greenland. I love you. <3]
- Symbolism ahoy. This was definitely the first thing I noticed. Especially when Light and L seemed to be on top of skyscrapers. I guess this shows they're both above the rest of the world. It also shows who's 'winning' based on who's highest.
- Red oni blue oni. Colour-coded for your convenience.
- We all have breaking points (Hello Matsuda, please put down the gun).
- Near isn't all that bad, despite my initial hatred of him. "Together, we can surpass L" was a brilliant line
- I think L was an anchor for Light. He stopped his decline into insanity, if only temporarily.
- The scene with L's death is haunting. Light seems to have a moment of regret; his eyes widen as they did when he was no longer Kira (or perhaps that was just shock) and he genuinely seemed worried. Then, as he held L, Kira must have returned because that grin was just... no.
- To think that the last thing L saw before dying was that. (Also note the symbolism. In that scene, Light was higher than L, and his power is further established by having Light hold him.
- Everything's rectified in the end. L is looking down on Light. Whether it's a hallucination or not doesn't matter; it still shows L was the winner. (Or, I suppose, the Wammy boys in general)
- I guess you could argue there were no winners. Everyone lost something.
- Mello knew he was going to die. That there was such a beautiful moment for him. He knew but he still did what was right. Bravo to both him and Matt.
- Back to the Matsuda thing in the last scene, Matsuda was the only one who admitted to sympathising with Kira. He understood what Kira was doing. Even Light remembered this and tried to appeal to that side of him, but to no avail. Yay Matsuda ^_^
- Mikami's facial expressions were lol-worthy.
- Light used everyone. Did he even have any friends by the end of it?
- Back to symbolism one last time; Ryuk was the only one who ended up on top of it all. And it's true, really. He's the only one who had nothing to lose.
You just have so many things to look back on.
Personally, I can't go past Light's maniacal laughter. Or when he had been shot and was lying in the water. Most people died with some dignity. Light was internally begging for help (and actually asked for it from Mikami, Misa and Takada). And then he died. Alone. On a staircase (which must've been rather uncomfortable).
Delightful. Death Note is such a happy story =)
So I finished watching Death Note last night. That last episode. Wow. Yeah. The first half is just a total mindfuck, and you have no idea who's going to win. Then Light goes off the deep end a little bit more, and the rest of the show ends up being rather... sad.
Not crying-sad, just... unfortunate-sad. You can't help but wonder if anyone made it out alright.
So this is what I've noticed throughout the series (Spoilers abound! Turn away if you didn't want to know which yaoi couples became canon, or which side decided to blow up a good portion of Greenland)
...[I'm kidding Greenland. I love you. <3]
- Symbolism ahoy. This was definitely the first thing I noticed. Especially when Light and L seemed to be on top of skyscrapers. I guess this shows they're both above the rest of the world. It also shows who's 'winning' based on who's highest.
- Red oni blue oni. Colour-coded for your convenience.
- We all have breaking points (Hello Matsuda, please put down the gun).
- Near isn't all that bad, despite my initial hatred of him. "Together, we can surpass L" was a brilliant line
- I think L was an anchor for Light. He stopped his decline into insanity, if only temporarily.
- The scene with L's death is haunting. Light seems to have a moment of regret; his eyes widen as they did when he was no longer Kira (or perhaps that was just shock) and he genuinely seemed worried. Then, as he held L, Kira must have returned because that grin was just... no.
- To think that the last thing L saw before dying was that. (Also note the symbolism. In that scene, Light was higher than L, and his power is further established by having Light hold him.
- Everything's rectified in the end. L is looking down on Light. Whether it's a hallucination or not doesn't matter; it still shows L was the winner. (Or, I suppose, the Wammy boys in general)
- I guess you could argue there were no winners. Everyone lost something.
- Mello knew he was going to die. That there was such a beautiful moment for him. He knew but he still did what was right. Bravo to both him and Matt.
- Back to the Matsuda thing in the last scene, Matsuda was the only one who admitted to sympathising with Kira. He understood what Kira was doing. Even Light remembered this and tried to appeal to that side of him, but to no avail. Yay Matsuda ^_^
- Mikami's facial expressions were lol-worthy.
- Light used everyone. Did he even have any friends by the end of it?
- Back to symbolism one last time; Ryuk was the only one who ended up on top of it all. And it's true, really. He's the only one who had nothing to lose.
You just have so many things to look back on.
Personally, I can't go past Light's maniacal laughter. Or when he had been shot and was lying in the water. Most people died with some dignity. Light was internally begging for help (and actually asked for it from Mikami, Misa and Takada). And then he died. Alone. On a staircase (which must've been rather uncomfortable).
Delightful. Death Note is such a happy story =)
Nov 2, 2010
Totes Learning Japanese
And failing at it.
Konbanwa. Watashi wa GoJo desu. Hajimemashite ^^
Or something.
I cannot, for the life of me, figure out the kanji. Romaji is pretty easy though. The only exception is in numbers.
I can write and read from 1 to 99 in kanji. I can't write out what all the numbers are in romaji though. Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, roku, nana, hachi? Ku? Or kyu? I think ten is juu.
Ahem. Anyway, it's confusing.
But I'll get there eventually.
I figure I'll learn how to speak it by both study and using the immersion technique. I like subbed anime and I've been listening to music with Japanese vocals for awhile. No problems there.
Still... this seems like more hard work than what it's worth.
Hm. Oh well.
Wish me luck. =D
Konbanwa. Watashi wa GoJo desu. Hajimemashite ^^
Or something.
I cannot, for the life of me, figure out the kanji. Romaji is pretty easy though. The only exception is in numbers.
I can write and read from 1 to 99 in kanji. I can't write out what all the numbers are in romaji though. Ichi, ni, san, shi, go, roku, nana, hachi? Ku? Or kyu? I think ten is juu.
Ahem. Anyway, it's confusing.
But I'll get there eventually.
I figure I'll learn how to speak it by both study and using the immersion technique. I like subbed anime and I've been listening to music with Japanese vocals for awhile. No problems there.
Still... this seems like more hard work than what it's worth.
Hm. Oh well.
Wish me luck. =D
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